The 3^rd Sunday After Trinity

SERMON

Text: Ephesians 6:1-4

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with promise; that it may be well with you and you may live long of the earth." And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.

In Christ Jesus, who stands by Christian fathers as they seek to fulfill their God-given calling in the home, dear fellow redeemed:

Just over one month ago on Mother’s Day, I stood in this pulpit and encouraged you to thank God for faithful Christian mothers--mothers who lead their children to Jesus, who encourage their children to use their God-given gifts, and who are good Christian examples for their children. Today, on this Father’s Day, I would encourage you also to THANK GOD FOR FAITHFUL CHRISTIAN FATHERS! Let us recognize their importance within the family!

God designed the family to consist of a father, mother, and children. unfortunately, because of sin in this world God’s concept of family has come under attack in a variety of ways. We find within our society an increasing number of single-parent homes, some fathers, but mostly mothers raising their children on their own. While many of these parents are doing a heroic job of raising their children, it is difficult to do so by oneself. Even our secular society is becoming increasing aware of the vital roles that both parents play in the home, but especially the role that fathers play. It is imperative, therefore, that all of us in our Christian community recognize, treasure, and attempt to preserve God’s institution of family as He planned it.

Our God has much to say to families in general, and to fathers in particular. Let us consider the words of our text taken from Paul’s Epistle to the Ephesians. In doing so, let us THANK GOD FOR CHRISTIAN FATHERS...

I.

Who are honored by their children! The opening words of our text are directed not to fathers and mothers, but rather to children. Paul writes, "Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with promise; that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth."

I would imagine there are very few people here today, who walked into this worship service without knowing that today is Father’s Day. If you have been reading the advertisements in the paper, or been listening to the radio, or been shopping in almost any store, you will know this for everywhere there are messages encouraging people to buy cards and gifts for fathers. Children, there is something, however, that you can give your fathers which is more precious than any message you could find for them on a card from the Hallmark Store, or any gift you could give them in a box from Radio Shack, and it will not cost you a thing! That something is your "honor." The 4th Commandment says, "Honor your father and your mother!" If you do that, it will be the nicest gift you could ever give your father on Father’s Day or any other day!

What does it mean to honor your fathers? It means a variety of things. It means to love them and to respect them. Above all, however, it means to "obey" them. Paul says, "Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right." Children, the meaning of the word "obey" is to listen very closely to what your parents say, and then eagerly do what they say! Obedience is not always easy, because we have our old, sinful flesh that tells us at times to do the exact opposite of what we should do. But the Holy Spirit will help all of you, if you ask Him, to do what your parents ask. Now, notice that Paul says, "Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right." Paul didn’t say, "Obey your parents...when you think they are right." God does not give children the right to disobey their parents when they think that their parents are being unfair or unkind. No, children are to obey their parents in everything, unless parents command their children to do something wrong in God’s eyes. When you children do this, you will be especially blessed by the Lord for God attaches a special promise to His Fourth Commandment. Yes, let us THANK GOD FOR FAITHFUL CHRISTIAN FATHERS who are honored by their children, and...

II.

Who bring up their children in the training and admonition of the Lord! After first talking to children, Paul turns to Christian fathers and advises them in the following manner, "And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord."

Before proceeding, I want to address an underlying issue of importance for all fathers, and which really lays a proper basis for Paul’s words. We are living in an age of tremendous stress and time commitments. Both fathers and mothers frequently find themselves pulled in many different directions and often the one place that really suffers in the home. Fathers, it is absolutely imperative that you make the raising of your children a priority in your lives. Allow me to provide two illustrations. Years ago, I worked for a district judge in Eau Claire. He was a wonderful man, who had a passion for hunting. One of his favorite pastimes was training his hunting dogs to retrieve. He always maintained that there was a critical time while a dog was young during which it could be easily trained. If you missed that opportunity, it was difficult if not impossible to train the dog properly. Consequently, in spite of his pressing schedule, he made time to train his young dogs, for if he didn’t they would be more difficult to handle in the future. Fathers, what was true of the judge’s dogs is also true of your children, and they of course are much more important than hunting dogs. Your children need you while they are young. Many future problems will be prevented, and many future sorrowful hours will be averted, if you make your children a priority in your life now. The second example is simply the message of a folk song sung twenty-five years ago, called "A Cat in the Cradle." Some of you will no doubt remember it. It was all about a young father who was very busy and never available for his son, who was so eager as a child to spend time with him. The years went by, and as the young father and his son grew older, the father began to want to spend time with his son, but by then son was no longer interested. In fact the son had become very much like the father--busy, disconnected, and failing to understand that family must be given priority in our lives. Dear fathers, make your family life a priority--you will be richly blessed and so will your wife and children!

Returning now to the words of Paul. He urges us, "Fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath." How might you exasperate your children? Perhaps some children are saying to themselves, "Let me count the ways," for there are many ways we can do this unfortunately because of our own sins and weaknesses. However, I believe there are two ways in particular that fathers can "provoke your children to wrath"--one is to be too harsh, while the other is to be too lenient. Children need the limits of good discipline to lead a safe and happy life. Fathers, who are too harsh, whose love is not evident, who are overbearing or abusive in their attempts to keep children in line are not providing good discipline, nor are they fulfilling their God-given duties as a father. On the other hand, those fathers who let everything go, who set no limits, who do not stand tall and provide good and godly discipline are likewise sinning.

What ought fathers to do? Paul says, "Bring them (your children) up in the training and admonition of the Lord." The word "training" here means instruction, involving both positive information and correction. The word "admonition" refers to the idea of instruction once again, but with the purpose of bringing about a positive change of behavior. Both of these are to be done in connection with the "Lord." Dear fathers, we need to bring our children up in the word and knowledge of their God. This we do by word and example. When our Savior is important to us, we will be able to convey that importance to our children. Let us lead our families in devotions in our homes. Let us strive to pray for and with our children. Let us instruct them in the basic Christian teachings of sin and grace. Do not let that privilege and exciting opportunity slip through your fingers under the assumption that the pastor, or Sunday School teacher, or Christian Day School teacher will take care of that. Let us establish clear boundaries and discipline our children not in anger, but with the full knowledge that God expects us to correct sinful attitudes and actions and that such correction is vital for our children. When we lead children to a knowledge of their sin, let us be sure to lead them also to the knowledge of the love and forgiveness of their Savior. Our children need to know that their God loves them, cherishes them, forgives them, and watches over them, even as he does each of us fathers and mothers.

It has always interested me to realize that God chose as His most familiar descriptive name the word, "Father." What a privilege and responsibility for Christian fathers to have and to bear. We are to image God’s relationship with us in our relationship with our children. When our children think of the term "father," of what do they think? In his article in Friday’s Free Press, columnist Leonard Pitts stated, "I’m talking about my old man. About his drinking and his rage. About the good times when he made us laugh. And about the bad ones, when he made us fear." I would hope that as our children think of the term "father" they would not think of drunkenness or abusive words or actions, but rather "faith, hope, integrity, discipline, love and an example leading them to the cross of Christ and eternal glory." For anything less may God forgive us fathers, and may we by grace be moved to step forward and fulfill our God-given callings, for then we all can and will THANK GOD FOR CHRISTIAN FATHERS! Amen.

—Pastor Paul D. Nolting